The holidays are often portrayed as a time of joy, warmth, and togetherness. But for many people, this season brings a very different set of emotions—overwhelm, stress, and anxiety.
If you've ever felt tense, exhausted, or emotionally drained during the holidays, you're not alone. In fact, mental health professionals frequently see an uptick in stress-related concerns during this time of year. But why is that? Let’s unpack what could be going on beneath the surface.
1. Unrealistic Expectations
From holiday movies to social media, we’re surrounded by messages that the holidays should be perfect. The perfect meal. The perfect family gathering. The perfect gifts. The pressure to create a flawless holiday experience can become crushing, especially if real life looks very different.
What this does to your mental health:
Fuels feelings of inadequacy
Triggers perfectionism
Increases comparison and self-criticism
When reality doesn’t match the idealized version of the holidays, it can leave people feeling disappointed, isolated, or like they’ve somehow failed.
2. Financial Stress
Gift-giving, traveling, decorating, and hosting events can add up quickly. Even when money is tight, many feel obligated to spend beyond their means to meet social or family expectations.
What this does to your mental health:
Increases financial anxiety
Leads to guilt or shame around spending and finances
Can trigger conflict with partners or family members
Money worries don’t go away just because it’s a festive season—they often get worse.
3. Family Tensions
The holidays often involve family gatherings, which can be a source of love and connection—but also conflict. Old wounds, personality clashes, or strained relationships may surface when everyone is under the same roof.
What this does to your mental health:
Reopens emotional wounds
Triggers anxiety or defensiveness
Drains energy and emotional bandwidth
For some, spending time with family brings up unresolved issues or reinforces feelings of being misunderstood, judged, or unseen.
4. Grief and Loneliness
The holidays can be a painful reminder of who or what is missing. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a recent breakup, or being far from home, feelings of grief or loneliness often become magnified during this season.
What this does to your mental health:
Intensifies sadness and isolation
Triggers depressive symptoms
Undermines a sense of belonging
Seeing others celebrate while you’re struggling can create a deep sense of disconnection, even in the most crowded room.
5. Overcommitment and Burnout
Holiday calendars fill up fast—with parties, dinners, volunteering, shopping, and more. Saying “yes” to everything may seem polite or festive, but it can quickly lead to emotional and physical burnout.
What this does to your mental health:
Leaves little time for rest or reflection
Increases irritability and fatigue
Reduces the capacity to enjoy anything fully
When your energy is stretched too thin, even joyful events can start to feel like chores.
6. Disrupted Routines
Travel, guests, school breaks, and time off work can throw daily routines off track. That might mean less sleep, poor eating habits, skipping exercise, or falling behind on self-care practices.
What this does to your mental health:
Disrupts sleep and mood regulation
Contributes to feelings of chaos or instability
Makes managing mental health conditions more difficult
Structure and routine help us feel grounded—losing them, even temporarily, can shake that foundation.
What Can You Do About It?
Here are a few ways to protect your mental health during the holidays:
Set realistic expectations. Embrace imperfection and focus on meaningful connection, not flawless execution.
Stick to a budget. Decide ahead of time what you can afford, and don’t be afraid to set limits on spending.
Protect your boundaries. It’s okay to say no to events or conversations that don’t feel healthy for you.
Schedule downtime. Build in rest breaks—even during busy days. It’s worth it!
Honor your emotions. If you’re grieving or feeling low, allow space for that without guilt.
Stay connected. Reach out to friends, support groups, or professionals if you’re feeling isolated or overwhelmed.
The holidays are emotionally complex. Joy and sadness, excitement and stress, love and loss—they can all exist side by side. Understanding the why behind your holiday overwhelm doesn’t make it go away, but it helps you meet yourself with more compassion and less self-judgment.
You don’t have to force holiday cheer to prove anything. Taking care of your mental health is one of the most meaningful gifts you can give yourself—and those around you.
Start Working with A Therapist in Asheville, NC
Online trauma therapy in North Carolina can help you manage the stressful holiday season. Whether you're navigating family dynamics, coping with loss, or managing seasonal anxiety, a therapist can provide support and strategies tailored to your needs. Don’t hesitate to seek help; taking this step can lead to a more fulfilling and peaceful holiday experience. Remember, your mental health matters, and you deserve to feel your best during this special time. Take the first step with our team of caring therapists at Strive On Counseling today by following these simple steps:
Meet with a compassionate therapist
Begin your journey to healing and relief!
Other Services Offered by Strive On Counseling
At Strive On Counseling, we understand that anxiety and depression are just one part of a larger picture of mental health. That’s why we offer a range of mental health services designed to support your overall well-being. In addition to online trauma therapy, our services include individual counseling, anxiety treatment, EMDR trauma therapy, therapy for men’s issues, mindfulness practices, Buddhist counseling, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and teletherapy/online therapy. Some other resources we offer include guided meditations, a list of books and other useful resources, and online courses. If you would like more information about any of these services, please don’t hesitate to reach out and start your therapy journey in North Carolina today!